An older lady was on The Price Is Right and shouted on her dead husband in her purse. I am going to unfairly make assumptions about this lady such as:
- Her kids don’t see her as much as they used to
- She owns no less than 4 cats
- Her husband decided enough was enough and died
To that last point- her poor husband. This guy was probably married to this lady for 40 years. Provided for her, raised a few kids and decided he had enough. 4 decades of crazy will take its toll on anyone. And make no mistake. This lady is certifiable. Not just for carrying around her husband’s ashes but for keeping them.
Isn’t it standard practice to spread your loved ones ashes at a place they cherished? Like the ocean or a cliff or something? This lady just carries him around with her! Probably goes out to lunch and asks for a table for 2 and plops him on the other side of the table and tells the waiter that he will have a water and caesar salad because his doctor told him his cholesterol was high.
He probably thought he was escaping when he “tragically” passed. Gonna either go chill in heaven where he can have a steak and a whiskey or, if you’re not into heaven, just be alone, forever, with nobody to bother him. Poor bastard is looking down (or up) thinking what the fuck do I have to do to get rid of her??
Sleep with her sister, Johnny. That way when she kills you at least you’ll be left alone.
Bowles' Blog 